The ultimate PMS survival guide (for gals and guys)

Ih8everythingJokes about Psychotic Mood Shifts (PMS) aren’t funny. Period.

Even less so when you’ve run low on chocolate, preventing you from setting off on a Perpetual Munching Spree around the house.

 

So if you’re facing the dilemma of having to leave the safety of home, then …

… here some essential things to bring along.

Plainly Men Suck, so have a break:

Kit Kat Chunky

A pocket kitten! Tip: keep it out of sight to avoid having to interact with people.

pocket kitten

Some light reading for women written by female authors. You know, the ones who are famous for only writing few days a month. Tip: these books are not found at Barns & Nobles but are usually right next to the sanitary section at Walmart:

savage-dreams

Tissues!!! OMG, You can never have enough! So pad any space in your bags with them and use some packs to firmly lock that kitten in place.

Hello-Kitty-Sniff-Tissues

This great App for PMS-Selfies:

selfie app

Gents, if you want to make it safely, and without bruises through the cycle, I suggest to avoid topics about soccer, bro-stories, talking about yourself. In fact don’t talk at all, unless you’re asked, and: Think before opening that pie-hole.

If for some illogical reason you’re asked to come along when she goes out, …. It may be a trick question! Don’t do it unless 100% certain she really wants you there. Of course you never find out until you go but you’ll learn it by trial and error don’t you worry. If you’re new to this then bring along some pocket Pez which you can randomly dispense and offer as a token of good-will when feeling cornered.

pez Here a quick guide which could help you avoid sticky situations:

the hormone guide

About these ads
This entry was posted in musings and tagged , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to The ultimate PMS survival guide (for gals and guys)

  1. jojo2442 says:

    Only slightly offensive at times but just absolutely hilarious. Good job :)

  2. laxuman88 says:

    Reblogged this on laxuman88 and commented:
    Cool

  3. Pingback: The ultimate PMS survival guide (for gals and g...

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s