Jokes about Psychotic Mood Shifts (PMS) aren’t funny. Period.
Even less so when you’ve run low on chocolate, preventing you from setting off on a Perpetual Munching Spree around the house.
So if you’re facing the dilemma of having to leave the safety of home, then …
… here some essential things to bring along.
Plainly Men Suck, so have a break:
A pocket kitten! Tip: keep it out of sight to avoid having to interact with people.
Some light reading for women written by female authors. You know, the ones who are famous for only writing few days a month. Tip: these books are not found at Barns & Nobles but are usually right next to the sanitary section at Walmart:
Tissues!!! OMG, You can never have enough! So pad any space in your bags with them and use some packs to firmly lock that kitten in place.
This great App for PMS-Selfies:
Gents, if you want to make it safely, and without bruises through the cycle, I suggest to avoid topics about soccer, bro-stories, talking about yourself. In fact don’t talk at all, unless you’re asked, and: Think before opening that pie-hole.
If for some illogical reason you’re asked to come along when she goes out, …. It may be a trick question! Don’t do it unless 100% certain she really wants you there. Of course you never find out until you go but you’ll learn it by trial and error don’t you worry. If you’re new to this then bring along some pocket Pez which you can randomly dispense and offer as a token of good-will when feeling cornered.
Here a quick guide which could help you avoid sticky situations: